I always claimed that I could hold my liquor. I was lying.For one, I don't have a husband. Also, I have no German heritage. And, um, I haven't puked in a car since college, and I haven't puked out of a car since grad school, though I was close last March.
But to admit that I was dizzy and inappropriate after a few drinks would belie my German/Irish/English heritage, my Guy’s Girl persona, and my profession as a writer. Despite a few debacles (a sullied car or two, the suggestion that we have sex when, in fact, we already had) I persisted in behavior like downing shots with the 23-year-old at work, or worse, drinking with actors. Such hardy drinking resulted in my husband wisely escorting me out the side exit of many establishments, but I refused to be ashamed.
Because in the good old days, I would have had at least half a bottle [of wine] by myself and would have started slurring non-sequiturs to my husband in the middle of “Damages.”Once again, no husband. Also, I don't really watch TV (certainly not at the moment, as I have neither a television nor a cable hook up). Also, I usually drink an entire bottle of wine before I start slurring, and non-sequiturs are basically the basis of most conversations with me. Well, and the whole piece is about drinking and having a kid which I definitely (thankfully) don't have.
Anyway, all of this is to say that somehow, I need to figure out how to get hired to blog for Proof. I'll even drink this Unicum shit if it helps.