Wednesday, March 11, 2009

Recommendation #5

From Erica, who knows I can never resist a good someecard. I have to admit, though, you don't want me on your side in a softball game unless you want someone who knows all the rules and can keep score or coach, because I have shitty hand-eye coordination.
I'm sending you my testimonial via ecard, because I thought this card was appropriate.

REASONS WHY MEGAN CARPENTIER IS AWESOME TO DATE

1) She's awesome. No really, she has a ton of fun, a great laugh, and is really into having a good time. Which is like, you know, important if you're into having a good time as well.
2) She is smart. Who else can have conversations about international politics, feminist theory, and celebrities' sex lives with an equal amount of insight on all of them?
3) She will tell you how she feels. Who the hell wants to deal with someone who putzes around, hinting at a reason why they might be mad but never just coming out with it. Not you right? Good, because Megan won't do that. If she is upset or disagrees with you, she'll just tell you. Revolutionary, right?
4) She has great boobs, and knows how to use them.
5) She is funny, and will make you laugh so hard you'll snort beer out your nose
6) And above all, she is one of the most loyal, caring and dedicated friends I have ever met. She will be there through thick and thin, irregardless, and will do whatever it takes to make sure you're ok. If that means driving through snow for eight hours, ok! Phone calls in the middle of the night? Sure! She is the person you want to have your back in a bar fight, on your side in the softball game, and there for you when something bad happens. You can count on her without question. Because when she cares about someone she does it 100%, with all her heart.*

*disclaimer: this last point especially makes her friends care very much about her, which can make it very dangerous if you do something wrong or that hurts Megan. Short of it is, you better treat her well or there WILL be consequences.

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

wow..lots of mentions of your great boobs in every reference! The way your friends describe you, I'd say that in life you are exactkly as you seem in your writing, i.e., smart, fun and sexy. i have to take the boobs part on faith, unless you start posting chesty pictures.

T. Bob

Anonymous said...

I believe there is photographic evidence that the boobs are, indeed, as awesome as described. PG evidence, mind you, but all that is necessary for the creatively inclined.

Jack said...

Oh, they are spectacular indeed. Plus she's kinda short, so the view is total vantage - especially when she's on her knees. And she hates to be reminded of that, but it was totally awesome.

Hey megs!

Megan said...

Jack: I've never screwed around with anyone called Jack, and anyone I ever did screw around with knows better than to call me "Megs."

Also, congrats on trying to slut shame me. Did it make your penis feel longer than 2 inches erect?